Being Fierce in ’15 – Dispelling the False Association Between Feminism and Misandry

12 Feb

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We’re going back to basics. Have you ever heard the term misandrist? It’s like the antonym for misogynist and pertains to hatred for men instead of women.

Lately, discussions of feminism have been at an all-time high as celebrities such as Emma Watson are taking a public stand on the issue of inequality between sexes. Consequently, most backlash and negativity seems to attack feminism at it so-called weak spot, calling supporters “man-haters.” When did feminism become code for “person who hates men?” When did feminists become viewed as individuals who believe all men are predators? After all, feminist is just a word. A word to describe people who believe everyone should have equitable places in society regardless of their gender. Hey guys, that means we support you too!

Some feminists are misandrists, but it is not a criterion to join the movement. A portion does not equal a whole, even if that portion is very loud.

What matters is that feminism, distilled down to its most inner core, is about gender equality, with the goal of creating a society or utopia in which gender does not restrict an individual from an equitable shot at success and happiness.

Most feminists, including myself, politely disagree with the belief that women are better than men, and conversely try to convey that we’re all deserving and worthy – women, men, trans – and should be treated as such.

Man-hating is unfortunately a reactionary sentiment identified with feminism.

So…What Does Feminism Say Is Bad?

Feminism came about because of sexism – it’s historical presence as well as its existence today. Sexism is the problem, and a problem that is largely engaged in by men, and a lot of women internalize. Because men are largely the vehicles for sexism, they oftentimes wrongly associate feminism as an attack on men. But we’re not out for your blood in particular, our sights are on the patriarchy.

Men become participators in sexism because they have been taught to behave and think that way. Women internalize it for the same reason.

Aside from seeking equality, feminism asks both men and women to think about those normalized behaviors created by society, and calculate the impact. More than anything, the movement asks to hold people accountable who perpetuate sexism whether they realize their behavior is sexist or not.

It’s easy to get defensive about this. Whenever my boyfriend and I debate if feminism is relevant or even needs to exist today, he oftentimes brings up the belief that men can’t be accountable for sexist behavior they never thought/knew was wrong. To no avail I argue that this does not make it acceptable.

It all comes down to society and educating our peers how to treat each other with equity. That is what feminism seeks to achieve.

Saying all feminists hate men is a stigma, which closely relates to the notion that college is just one big beer fest. But you and I both know that college is more than that, isn’t it? Maybe I went to the wrong university…

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4 Responses to “Being Fierce in ’15 – Dispelling the False Association Between Feminism and Misandry”

  1. Jim March 24, 2015 at 9:36 am #

    in life, it doesn’t really matter what you think as long as you get along with people. in the end, how you behave when you’re at odds says more about your character and who you are than all the nice things you did when you got along. why? because it’s very easy to be nice when you’re on the same side with someone. 70-90% of divorces are initiated by women, and most women rake men over the coals. the problem is compounded by the attitude that men deserve this treatment. this is never in dispute when women get together and compare notes. men are always the enemy, and even if the women cheated on the man, it’s because he deserved it. people don’t judge a thing by it’s beginning, but by the end or outcome of it. and the outcome almost always is bad for the guy. since most women who divorce their husbands are feminists, an easy correlation is drawn between feminists and man-haters. christian or other ‘spiritual-faith-committed” women have a reputation for divorcing less often, but that’s not actually true. most of the ranks of the church are filled with feminist women as well, and so going to church is not any indicator of likeliness to remain married. the real indicator of success is feminist or non-feminist. a non-feminist woman doesn’t believe in female independence, so she doesn’t believe it’s okay to ditch her man when things get tough. she believes that women DO need men. she hasn’t been seduced by sex in the city into thinking that she’s still prime meat well into her 30’s or even 40’s. long story short: if you’re a man, getting married greatly increases the odds of being fucked over by a woman. the whole ‘anti-patriarchy’ thing is a resentment by women of the fact that men DO NOT WANT women for the things that they want to be desired for. men do not need or want your ‘i’m just as good as you’ attitude or your career or your money. let’s make an analogy that we can all understand. if i were an enemy soldier, and i was considering taking a shot at 2 american soldiers, which life is more valuable? both men are somebody’s son, brother, father. they both have equal worth. from our perspective though, they are different, though. one is a private, and one is a sergeant, one holds a higher rank, and greater responsibility. both soldiers need each other, but they hold different jobs. each one is capable of something the other is not. in the same way that women and men need each other. the problem is that women want to be the sergeant, men aren’t attracted to men. plain and simple. it’s never going to change and wanting it to change isn’t going to make it change. i have the dick. i fuck you. you receive the fucking. if you don’t want to get fucked then you’re defective, because women are supposed to want to get fucked. you’re supposed to want the man to be the leader and take care of you. if you don’t, then there’s something wrong with you. femininity receives masculinity. if you don’t receive masculinity, then it’s because you’re not being feminine. so- feminism is actually the opposite of being feminine. men don’t like fucking other men. men will practically WORSHIP a woman that knows how to be feminine. but women are broken these days and they act like men. it’s no wonder you can’t keep a man. and then when your perverted and delusional sense of what you think a man should appreciate doesn’t work, you become resentful and furious at the rejection, and seek revenge. feminism has also taught you that you DESERVE to have what you want. so when a man isn’t complying to be what you want him to be, you become more than hurt. you become angry, as anyone would become angry if they were broken into and robbed. you feel deprived of something rightfully yours. this fuels your need for revenge, and so you will demonize the man, dehumanize him, devalue him, to the point that you feel justified in doing as much damage to him as possible. if you are a feminist, you are either a man-hater, or a man-hater-in-waiting.

    Like

    • mlsaettler March 24, 2015 at 2:09 pm #

      Jim,

      I will not speak to views on marriage or divorce because I believe you are speaking from a personal experience that I cannot empathize with.

      However….

      Equality means not discriminating between two people on the basis of caste, creed, gender, race, religion, language or any other parameter you can think of.

      Women being equal to men means that if both of them applied for a job, the only criteria for selection and pay would be their talent. WOMEN DO NOT WANT TO BE MEN!

      It means the same judging parameters, irrespective of gender. Same opportunities, same rights.

      No two people are equal to each other in every way. No two groups of people are equal to each other in every way. There is always some built-in inequality between people or groups. That’s neither good nor bad, it’s just the way things are. It’s a matter of fact, not of values. We can’t choose to change it, even if we wanted to.

      But we should treat people equally in regards to their dignity and worth. Those should not have to be “earned.”. That’s a matter of values, not facts. And we can choose to implement those values. To the extent we make that choice, we are decent human beings. It is not about being tolerant, it’s about being fair.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Jim March 24, 2015 at 10:12 am #

    also, feminism doesn’t seek equality, it seeks equivalence. women are for some reason jealous of men, and want to be men, only without the penis (usually). in order for a relationship to work you have to have a male and a female. if women become masculine, then logic dictates that men must become feminine. and you see a lot of that actually with the mr. mom epidemic. problem is women lose respect for men who become feminine, and men lose respect for themselves. the relationship suffers and then you get a divorce (usually when the wife goes outside the marriage to find another man that makes her panties wet) feminism tries to solve the problem of a lack of love by ‘turning the tables’ and reversing the roles. put men in the house changing diapers while the wife works. make men dependent on women and then men will be forced to be loving and faithful. WRONG. the problem started with women feeling unloved within the home, and therefore sought fulfillment outside the home. but it’s the law of supply and demand. big business knows this, and that’s why they are the biggest financial contributors to ‘equal pay for equal work’. they love it….because they know what that really equals is twice the work for half the pay. companies now pay both mom AND dad to work full time what they used to pay just the dad 40 years ago. women actually have much less of what they want in today’s society than they ever had before. most of them are single moms working their hands to the bone just to keep their kids from being taken by social services. feminism = broken families and poverty for most. feminism, despite all evidence to the contrary, continues to blame ‘the patriarchy’ for the problem. if those bastard men would just fess up a few more dollars then everything would be okay. whether it’s more child support or a bigger spending allowance or a better salary from the corporation. the message is always the same: more money will solve the problem. those sexist men just need to pay more and give us our fair share. at some point you have to realize that feminism is just fundamentally wrong. the problems that it is still complaining about are just crutches to support an ideal that has no real foundation anymore. the problems are WORSE than ever for women, not better, despite women making more money in the workforce than ever before, and gleaning more from their husband’s wallets than ever before.

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    • mlsaettler March 24, 2015 at 2:11 pm #

      You are right it is not about hard equality – women and men don’t have to be equal. Why should we benchmark women against men?

      Men and women are born with anatomical differences. Differences which are necessary to spread the fittest genes to the next generation. That puts some constraints on their physical capabilities. After the evolution took us to the Homosapien stage we have lived as cavemen for most of the times, using brute strength to establish dominance. Therefore, women being physically weak by nature, were suppressed. But in this age where we are civilized enough to not to use brute strength for dominance (at least in some parts of the world), I don’t see any reason to view women as inferior human beings.

      Therefore, women will never be equal to (or inferior to) men. They are different from men and they have no need whatsoever to be bench-marked against men for equality.
      We can’t discuss this topic without considering what “equal” actually means!

      If “equal” to you means, to be given the same importance and the respect then the question is as obvious as, “Can 3×3 ever be equal to 9?” The answer is YES! We will definitely get there. And then I would really like to answer question phrased as, “What do you think makes men and women equal?”

      If according to you “equal” means “being equal by qualities and quirks” then my generalized answer is NO! Women and men are designed to do different things. The reason I said “generalized answer” is, you should not apply this to a specific person. Let me clear this up with an example,
      Consider you have to hire someone to cut the wood. There’s a man and a woman applying for the task. Who would you choose? Even though statistically men are more suitable for this job, statistics aren’t effective when it comes to a singe person. In this case best way would be to test their skills and do the hiring.

      So in a nutshell it depends upon what you really mean by “equal”. Maybe I should rephrase my question to “When will women be TREATED equally as men?” You are making it sound like “Can 7 ever be equal to 9?”

      Liked by 1 person

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